Incomparable Strength

Once again, I knew this was coming, but I was not prepared for the flood of emotions that would rush out of me when it did.

My father had warned my that my great-grandmother would lose another child.  He even told me who it was.  But again, I felt unprepared for the loss.  It was Xiang Lai, my great-grandmother's second son.  While I wasn't as attached to him as I was to Li Zhu, who died in chapter 8, I think what made this loss extremely difficult was knowing the entire family felt it.

When Li Zhu passed away, my great-grandmother was living at Tao Sheng Lo, her mother-in-law's house.  She was left to grieve alone.  My great-grandfather was away studying at a university.  He didn't even know she died.  Because my father had spent so many chapters introducing us to Li Zhu, I felt as if I knew her and the loss was very personal.  Xiang Lai, on the other hand, was not a very central character in the book.  I did not feel the same attachment to him.  But I do feel it toward my grandmother, NaiNai, who was only nine-years-old at this time.  Seeing the death through her eyes, her fear, her confusion and her sorrow made this loss very real and painful.

But something beautiful came out of it.  My great-grandparents both felt responsible for Xiang Lai's death.  They grieved in very different ways.  My great-grandfather poured himself into work, to create the life he was not able to provide for Xiang Lai for his other two children.  My great-grandmother worked through her sadness by caring for other children Xiang Lai's age, which was four.  She realized she never made Xiang Lai a single new piece of clothing when he was alive, so she made clothes and donated them to a nearby church, to make sure other children his age got new clothes to wear.  She also made meals for other young children so they wouldn't go hungry.

Where she found the strength to keep going, I'll never know.  My great-grandmother was a remarkable woman.  She probably never knew a life without suffering.  She spent her life working through every imaginable hardship.  Yet she was still able to help others through her generosity.  I just hope she is able to see that through her strength and perseverance, she was able to provide a better life for her great-granddaughter.  Every luxury, every good thing I have in my life right now, I owe to my great-grandmother.

Diving Between The Pages

Today I'm going to pause from my normal blog about translating my father's book.

On Wednesday, I was listening to The Takeaway, one of my favorite "current news" programs on NPR here in OKC.  They were discussing e-books.  A publishing company had recently announced it will be focusing
primarily on developing its e-book brand.  The company will no longer be printing paperbacks.  Instead, paperback novels will be provided on an on-demand basis only.

Whaaaaaat?

Don't get me wrong.  I think there is a market out there for e-readers.  You know, those technologically-savvy people who have an i-this and i-that or some gizmo that orders your takeout, does your homework, maybe even feeds your dog.

No, I'm being cynical.  I would probably enjoy an e-reader if I received one as a gift.

You see, I absolutely love to read.  Not a day goes by that I don't pick up a book, pull open the cover and thumb through the pages.  I love the feeling of getting lost in someone else's words  The feeling of floating outside of myself and into the world of their creation and leaving behind my overly-structured, overly-controlled, overly-articulated life.

What I thought was going to be a temporary step onto my soap box immediately after I heard the news story turned into three days of contemplation.  I've mostly been thinking about my love affair with books.  Note, I said books, not reading.  I know reading will always be around, but if other publishing companies follow the example of the one featured in the piece, which an interviewee said they would, then what will become of some of my most prized possessions?

I tried to think back to my first visit to the library, but I think I was too young.  What I do remember perfectly clearly was my favorite show as a child.  Call me a nerd but I never missed an episode of Reading Rainbow.  Not only did it introduce you to new books, the show also showed you real life examples of the topics of books.  One of my favorites was when LeVar Burton brought us to the Boston Museum of Fine Arts and showed us the extensive mummy collection.  The book featured in that episode was Mummies Made In Egypt.  And who can forget the kids at the end?  I wanted so badly to be one of the kids talking about a book they had recently read.  I used to practice.  After I finished a book, I would practice what I would say if I got to be on Reading Rainbow.  Then I would end it with...say it with me..."But you don't have to take my word for it."

Little did I know, a TV show would shape my future love of books.  A little ironic, isn't it.  To me, books provide more than just entertainment.  Books give us an experience.  Trips to the library, getting lost in the stacks, smelling the dust.  The crack the spine makes when you open a brand new book, your fingers getting black from the ink on the newly printed pages.  Holding the corner of the page because you absolutely cannot wait to flip and see what happens next. Curling up in a comfy chair and getting lost as you dive between the pages.

 And it's not just the personal experience.  One of my favorite things to do is recommend great books to friends.  I love pulling a book off my shelf, handing it to a friend, watch him, usually her, gaze at the cover, run their fingers over it and decide they're going to give it a try.  Books can help build community, whether it's sharing books like me, or making new friends at the library or the book store.  In our ever-becoming isolated world, we simply can't afford to lose a force that can potentially bring people together.

I have no doubt I will get an e-reader at some point in my life.  I just love reading too much.  And I've heard great things about it, particularly the ability to carry so much reading material in one little device.  I just hope the market for the traditional book doesn't get diminished in the process.

And just to tie into the rest of this blog, a look at the book cover for my father's book.  A celebration of his work.  Imagine how anti-climatic it would have been for him if it was just a thumbnail on the internet as you download your e-book.

Getting Back To My Father's Book

Wow!  It's been so long since I've updated this blog.  This summer has been so busy, between my vacations and co-workers' vacations, which mean I have a forever alternating work schedule, I just have not had time to concentrate on this project!  But now, I'm back at it.  I spent three hours on the phone with my father yesterday and got two interesting blog topics to write about.  What I'm focusing on today is mostly historical.  1927 was really a turning point in Chinese history, particularly how it led to the fall of the Kuomingtang and the Communist Revolution.  (Keep in mind, I'm writing this as a descendant of so-called "Communist traitors.")

For many years, China was split into states, all of them controlled by warlords.  In 1926, the Kuomingtang began what was called the Northern Expedition, which was an effort to unify China.  It began in the south and moved north, hence the name.  The Communist Party, which was smaller at the time, joined in on the effort.  During this period, the Communist Party consisted of a lot of peasants and it was still relatively disorganized so most of its movements were somewhat chaotic.

In April of 1927, Chiang Kai-shek, who was an important military leader then, announced he wanted the Kuomingtang to separate from the Communist Party.  As a result, many of the Communists were caught and executed.  A few months later, in July, the Kuomingtang officially announced it was going to split from the Communist Party.  The Communists retreated from Wuhan quietly.  It was from here on out that the Communist Party was declared an illegal organization.

However, just because they were no longer "in power" the Communists did not stop organizing.  In fact, it was probably because they were forced to retreat that anger and resentment grew.  The party recruited peasants and other uneducated people who were unhappy with the way they were treated by the wealthy.  Therefore, the Chinese Communist Party become the force that eventually overthrew the Kuomingtang.

Back to 1926-1927, Wuhan served as a center for all of this activity.  This was when my great-grandfather joined the movement and served as an instructor at a military school there.  He supported the idea of a unified China.  However, he was mortified by the amount of unnecessary violence the Communist Party used to gain control.  When the Kuomingtang announced the separation, my great-grandfather was afraid he would be captured by the Communists so he went into hiding with his family.  They rented a small apartment in another section of Wuhan and used another name for a while.  It wasn't until the Kuomingtang took complete control of Wuhan that my great-grandfather and my family were able to lead somewhat normal lives again.

This was always a very confusing part of Chinese history for me.  I wasn't aware the Kuomingtang and the Communist Party worked together for a while.  I remember my LaoLao (my mother's mother) telling me when she was young, she was a part of the Communist Party.  I was shocked because I know my grandfather, her husband, died at the hands of the Communists during the Revolution in the 1960s.  Now I understand.  At one point, the two parties were mixed, supposedly fighting for the same goal on the surface, while each secretly wanted to gain total control of the country.

Through this process, I am not only learning about my family's history, I'm learning so much more about Chinese history as well.  And what I wrote here is an over-simplified version of events.  China's history is so much more complicated than I think I will ever understand.  I just hope I can get enough insight to know where I come from.